I don't know if I like the people man moving in to the guest house.

See, when the nice lady from New Orleans lived there, she let me in to play. Sometimes she'd let me sleep in the guest house with her. There was a nice hole in the screen so I could get in when I wanted to. The big man covered up the hole last week. The people man moving in says he likes cats - and who doesn't?- but he is allergic.

I think I know what allergic is. It means you don't really like cats, you just say you do. Like if you are a people and you are dating someone with a cat and you want to break up with them you just tell them you are allergic to their cat. I've heard about allergic from that punk, Jesse, that lives down the street. He said that's why boys stop dating his people girl.

Anyway, Mom told the new guest house people man that I would probably try to get in the house. And what kind of bad neighbor cat would I be if I didn't try to make friends with him? Mom gave the new people man a red water bottle with "Monkey Repellant" on it and told him to spray me!! Can you believe the nerve of Mom? Well, forget them all. I don't want to play with that allergic man anyway. He's probably not even cool.

Mom is gone again, but that's not news anymore, is it? She is in a place where they make faucets and it is pretty up there. She had to ride on an airplane to a place called Wisconsin to get there. Mom is not a plumber, so I don't know why she went to a place where they make faucets. I don't know for sure what Mom's job is but it has to do with other people's money.

She told the big man that the airplane smelled very bad yesterday when she was riding it and that it was very hot. She said that someone asked her if she had ridden a camel to Wisconsin, because she smelled like she did. The big man said that maybe they had just flown a herd of goats in on that airplane before Mom got on it.

I know that pets can fly. I've seen it on TV. There are little bags for cats and big crates for big dogs. If a herd of goats can fly on a plane, why can't I? Mom could put me in a little bag and I would fit under her seat. I can stay in her hotel room while she is out working and when she comes in at night, I could play with her and she could pet me.

I'd be real popular around the neighborhood if I could a traveling cat. I could tell stories about my travels and act like a big shot. Traveling would be cool, and I am a cool cat.