On the day that was Saturday, it was a good day at our house. Mom and the big man did not have to go to work and we had coffee on our porch with the screen around it so the gray cat can't get in. We read the paper and talked about stuff.

Then Mom and the big man put on their white shoes with laces and caps and ran away, but like always, they came back. We had lunch and then we went outside and we worked in our yard. The big man was working in the flower beds to make them nice so I will have a nice place to poo.

Most of the time when we work in the yard, we work all day and then Mom fixes us a big supper and we eat and then it is time to watch a movie or just go to bed. I should have known it was a regular Saturday on this Saturday because we finished our yard work and then Mom and the big man got cleaned up and put on nice clothes and left.

They were gone a long time and when they came back, the car was full of sacks from Walmart. I was very glad about that because I was about to run out of cat treats. I helped Mom and the big man unload all our stuff by running in and out of the door and attacking the sacks.

Then I knew there was going to be trouble. Mom started cooking stuff but it was past supper time. She said she was cooking special stuff because the next day was a special day for the big man where all the people kids and people babies were coming over to eat a lot of food and everybody was bringing the big man a present because it was a special day called Father's Day.

Why do those people babies always have to come over? They were just here last weekend! I am so tired of people babies! I told Mom that if the big man wanted to have a special day called Father's Day with people babies then he should go to their house and leave us alone! I do not like special days! I want the people babies to stay home!

Mom and the big man went to the place where people are nice to each other for a few minutes called church and when they got home, they worked very fast. The big man got my big water bowl out and filled it up with water. Then they got chairs out and Mom cooked more good food. Then a car pulled up and oh no! It was Red Head Boy!

He got in my big water bowl in the yard and splashed and played. He ran in the sprinkler and chased me with a wet ball. I had to hide from him under the table.

Then Black Hair Girl and Black Hair Boy came and the big man's people mom and dad. All the people kids of the big man were here. Everybody sat in chairs and there was not a chair left for me to sit in! I wanted to help the big man have a special day called Father's Day but the people babies kept bothering me. Black Hair Boy chased me and pulled my tail. Black Hair Girl tried to give me a bite of her jello and I took a bite just to be nice and then she chased me around and kept putting jello on me and saying "Monkey wikes jew-wo." Monkey does not like jew-wo! Monkey likes cat treats!

I ran under the fence to Mr. and Mrs. Neighbor's yard to get away from Black Hair Girl and she started crying. Mom told me I was being mean to run away so I came back and just laid down and Black Hair Girl put red jello on me! I do not like red jello!

The people babies all got in Mom's big bathtub because they were dirty. Mom had to clean them off because they cannot lick themselves like cats can. The people kids finally left and thank goodness they took all their people babies with them! Me and Mom and the big man were very tired and we were glad they went home to their own houses. We just relaxed and took it easy and were cool. I know how to do that because I am a cool cat.