I was hoping that me and Mom could have some peace and quiet while we waited for Santa Claus to come. But did that happen? NO. Wouldn't just know it? The people babies came to our house and stayed for 2 days and nights. Not only do they bother me but now they bother our computer. Mom has taught them how to use our computer and they have friends on the internet that talk to them called Grover, Elmo, and Cookie Monster. I could not use the computer to talk to my internet cat friends the whole time the people babies were here because they were always on the computer.

At least none of the people babies coughed up hair balls this time. I tried to stay outside a lot but it is very cold here and I had to come in the house to get warm. I think Santa got me an early present. I asked Santa for a bunch of things and one thing was for the stupid dogs that live in the yard behind us to find another place to live. Well, those stupid dogs that lived in the yard behind us have been gone ever since the people with the fast cars and flashing lights called policemen took their big man away. I am very happy about that and so is Mom. I don't know why Mom cares about the stupid dogs that lived in the yard behind us because they did not chase her up trees, but she was really glad that they are gone somewhere else with their big man.

It must be close for time for Santa to come to our house because Mom has the nice dishes on the table. I know what is going to happen. She is going to cook too much food and all the people are going to come over and bring all the people babies. Well that's fine because I already have my spot picked out.

When the people babies finally left and I got to use the computer, I had an email from my internet cat friend Lucy who lives in the place where 2 cities look alike called Minnesota. Lucy is a very smart cat and knows how to write numbers on paper. Lucy told me that if I wanted to see Santa when he got to our house, I needed to wait by the chimney. I did not know what a chimney is so I had to text my internet cat friend Sammie. I am going to marry Sammie as soon as someone tells me what that means.

Sammie said the chimney is a whole in our house that you can't see unless you poo in the fireplace. Well, I have pooed in the fireplace a bunch of times but I did not know that big hole above the fireplace was called a chimney! I was still confused about why I needed to wait by the chimney. Was Santa going to come in and poo in our fireplace? Sammie said no, Santa does not come in the doors, he comes down the chimney. I am very glad I have internet cat friends to help me.

So now I am waiting for Santa in the right place. I just know he is going to bring me lots of cat toys and treats. Because I have been a very good cat and I am cool.

HELP!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

SOMEBODY PLEASE HELP ME!!!!

THIS IS NOT FAIR!
THIS IS NOT COOL!

I am counting the days and nights until Santa Claus comes to our house. Mom does not tell me stuff about Santa Claus, but that punk Jesse from down the street said that his people kids wrote letters to Santa Claus to tell him the presents to bring. When Mom was in her new office working, I got stuff to write my letter to Santa Claus. It is hard for me to write because I do not have thumbs.

Mom and the big man were very busy last week and they were all worked up. The people nephew Anthony who goes to the place where he learns how to fight and be brave called the Army, came home and brought a girl. All the people family were happy about the people nephew Anthony's girl. The people family cooked too much food and everybody went to eat and see the people nephew and his girl.

I thought everything was very happy about the people kid Anthony and his girl. But it was not. On the day that was Saturday, all the people family and a bunch of people friends went to a party for the people nephew Anthony and his girl. The people family were very sad and they were crying. Mom was crying a lot and made her face black. I thought maybe the people family decided they did not like the people nephew Anthony and his girl any more but that was not it. Mom told me that the people nephew Anthony and his girl are getting on an airplane this week and they are going very far away to the place where people do not each other and shoot guns at each other called Iraq.

I got very sad about that too because I would not like to be in the place where people do not like each other and shoot guns at each other pcalled Iraq. Mom said that all the people family are very proud of the people nephew Anthony and his girl because they are very brave and strong to go to the place where people do not like at each and shoot guns at each other called Iraq. But the people family is sad because we will miss the people nephew Anthony and his girl while they are gone and we will worry about them because we want them to be safe.

Mom said that all the people family will go to the place where people act nice to each other for a few minutes called church and talk to God about the people kid Anthony and his girl. I do not know about the person called God, but I do know about Santa Claus. The next time Mom leaves the paper out, I will write a letter to Santa Claus about the people kid Anthony and his girl. Because I like the people kid Anthony, he is cool like me. I am a cool cat.

We had something called a long weekend at our house last week because it was the day that people say thank you for stuff called Thanksgiving. That means that the people kids came to our house, people babies came and brought suitcases and bags of diapers to stay at our house and Mom cooked too much food. I did not like any of it.

Pretty Girl came back to our house again and this time she brought her people mom and dad. That was OK with me because Pretty Girl is too little to bother me and all she wants to do is eat her hand. People babies are not very smart. If you eat your hand off, you cannot type on the internet.

The other people babies came to our house without their people moms and dads. Black Hair Girl, Black Hair Boy and Red Head Boy stayed at our house to sleep. They bother me. Black Hair Boy pulls my tail all the time and Black Hair Girl puts purses on me. I am a boy! I do not want a purse!

On the day that was Saturday, Mom was cooking our breakfast and Black Hair Boy started coughing hair balls in the living room. He coughed up a bunch of them and they smelled very bad. Mom was all worked up about it and I thought she would throw Black Hair Boy out in the garage because that is what she does to me when I cough up hair balls in the house. But did Mom do that? No she did not! And that is not fair! Mom picked up Black Hair Boy and she was petting him and talking very nice to him. And then you know Black Hair Boy did? He coughed up a hair ball ON MOM. Yes he did! I was so mad! Mom still did not throw him outside! She was not even mad. The next time I cough up a hairball, she better not throw me out or I will tell her she is not fair.

Buddha Boy came to our house with his people mom and dad on the night Mom cooked too much food. He is a new people baby and he is little like Pretty Girl. Buddha Boy leaks all the time. He leaks out of his diaper some, but he leaks out of his mouth all the time. He leaked all over Mom and all over our nice couch. But did Mom get mad? No, she did not! What it is about people babies that they can do bad stuff and not get in trouble?

After all the people babies and people kids left to go to their own houses, me and Mom got our Christmas stuff out of the hiding place up the stairs called the attic. We worked hard to get our Christmas stuff out in our house so Santa Claus would know we are ready for presents. Me and Mom have worked every night to make Christmas in our house. And what has the big man been doing while we are working? He sits at the table writing numbers on paper for the place called school and griping about the numbers called Algebra. Me and Mom get tired of the big man fussing about the numbers called Algebra. Mom has little white circles she puts in her ears called iPod so that she cannot hear the big man. I do not have little white circles for my ears called iPod so that I do not have to listen to the big man so I am going to ask Santa to bring me some.

We have Christmas in our house now so I am ready for Santa Claus. He knows what I want. I am waiting for him because I am a cool cat.