At the place where Mom works to make money and buy me cat treats, the people do not want to spend a lot of money on work stuff. Mom has been trying to do things without spending her work's money called cheap. While Mom was trying not to spend too much work money, she had to go to the place where the wind blows her hair and makes her mad called Kansas City. She did not have enough time for the airplanes to get her there so she had to drive to the airport by the people kid Julie's house to not spend money called cheap and fly on a plane that does not cost a lot of money called Southwest. We do not have those kinds of planes at our airport, so Mom had to drive a long way to find one.

She drove to the people kid Julie's house and spent the night and was all happy about seeing the people baby, Pretty Girl. That was fine with me because if Mom sees the people babies at their own houses, they do not have to come to ours. Mom got on the plane that does not cost a lot of money called Southwest and went to the place where the wind blew her hair and made her mad called Kansas City and then she came back.

When she came home from the airport where the cheap airplanes are, guess what she had with her? Yep, that's right. That people baby Pretty Girl! Mom does not have to do that! She saw Pretty Girl at her own house! I was all worked up about Pretty Girl being in Mom's car and I was not a happy cat.

But then it got worse. Mom opened the back of her car and guess what she had in there? I asked Mom what was that? She told me it was a cat. Yes, I knew it was a cat, I am a cat, I know what cats look like. But why is that cat in Mom's car? Why is that cat at our house? We already have a cat! We do not need another one!

Mom told me the cat was lost and lived in the woods. A nice lady found the cat and tried to help the cat. The cat lost its Mom and big man. The cat needs a new place to live because it does not want to go the place where cats are in jail called the shelter.

I do not blame the cat, I do not want to go to the place where cats are in jail called the shelter, but that does not mean I want the cat to live at our house. Mom told me I was only thinking of myself called selfish. I do not care about that, I just do not want another cat bothering me, eating my cat treats. I was very mad about this. Mom told me that was too bad, the cat was staying.

The big man did not know a cat rode in Mom's car to our house. I was waiting for him so that I could tell him to make the cat go away. The big man walked in our living room and the cat was laying on the couch by Mom. The big man said, "What is that?" and Mom said, "It was here when I got home, I thought it was yours."

I started growling and hissing because Mom was telling a story that was not right called a fib! Mom brought that cat to our house!

The big man petted the cat and said he liked the cat and that Monkey needs a friend. NO! Monkey does not need a friend! Monkey needs cat treats!

I was so sad about this. I tried to hiss and growl at the cat so he would run away but he did not. I would not let him eat food out my cat bowl but Mom just got him a different bowl.

Mom said the new cat's name is Larry and she took him to Dr. Smith's hospital to see if he is sick. He was a little bit sick and had to stay and get shots. He must have been broken too because Mom told the big man she had the new cat Larry fixed while he was Dr. Smith's hospital. But then guess what happened? Dr. Smith said that Larry had little bugs from the woods called worms and that I might have them too! I do not have little bugs from the woods! There is nothing wrong with me! But what did Mom do? She took me to Dr. Smith's hospital where the stupid dogs bark all the time and I had to eat big rocks called medicine and get three shots! I had to take 7 naps to feel better.

So now we have another cat at our house named Larry. I still do not like him. He needs to have his own Mom and big man, I do not want to share mine. That is not cool and I am a cool cat.

Every time I turn around, there are people babies at our house. I am very tired of it. Now that there are 5 people babies, there are too many. I am a busy cat. I do not have time to mess with people babies. It is spring time at our house, which means I have to kill things. I need to run around and be a cat, I do not have time to be nice to people babies.

The first people baby, Pretty Girl, came to our house with suitcases and stayed for too many days and nights. Pretty Girl's people mom and dad went far away where there are mountains and not enough air called Colorado to put sticks on their feet called skis and fall down on snow. We had snow and I did not like it. I would not go far away to the mountains where there is not enough air called Colorado just fall down on snow! But Pretty Girl stayed a long time. She cannot crawl or walk so she cannot get me, but she likes cats so Mom made me be nice to her. I did not want to be nice to her! I wanted to go outside and get a fat bird!

It wasn't long after Mom and the big man finally got rid of Pretty Girl that Tater Boy and Red Head Boy came to stay at our house. Tater Boy has not stayed at our house before, this was his first time. He can crawl on our new floors and he tried to bother me. I had to get on Mom's bed so he would not get me. Mom let Tater Boy take a bath in our sink. I did not like that because Mom washes my cat bowl in that sink and it does not need a Tater Boy in it messing it up.

Red Head Boy is 4 people years old now and he thinks he is very smart. When Mom and the big man do not do what he wants, he gets all mad and does something Mom calls pouts. If I were Mom I would just throw him out in the garage like she does me. But does Mom do that? No, she does not! She talks to Red Head Boy and is all funny trying to make him smile so he will not pout.

Our house is just fine without people babies, I don't know why Mom and the big man get all worked up about them. They are a lot of trouble. Pretty Girl and Tater Boy poo in diapers and cough up hair balls all the time. Mom has to clean them up all the time. Red Head Boy pouts. Black Hair Girl cries and gets very sad about stuff called a drama queen. Black Hair Boy gets Mom's tools out of her red box and hits things with her nice hammer. Mom and the big man do not have to keep people babies, they have their own moms and dads and their own houses.

I do not like it when they are here because Mom and the big man act like they like the people babies better than me. The people babies get in my way. That is not cool and I am a cool cat.