It has been a long time since I got to use the computer.

I think one reason that Mom has been upset with me is that I have more friends than she does. Last month I got a card from my friend Ink and last week I got a card about Thanksgiving from my friend Sammie who lives in the place where very important liars live called Washington. Mom did not get any cards and I think she didn't like it because I did. My friends like me.

We've been busy. First there was a special day where people all eat too much called Thanksgiving. Mom and the big man went away to somewhere else to eat too much but then they came home. I knew we were going to have a fun time because the people kid Julie and her man came to our house. We watched TV and played cards and the people kid Julie's man gave me something good to drink. He is very nice to share his drink with me. Mom never shares her drink with me.

The next day after the day that people eat too much, Mom, the people kid Julie and the big man did a lot of chores at our house. Mom cooked a lot of good food all day long. I was trying to help by licking the pots clean, but Mom didn't like that and put me outside. The people kid Justin came over when it got dark. I was looking forward to seeing him because me and Justin are cool but Justin tricked us and brought a people girl with him. Justin never brings people girls over and I'm not sure I like that. I was trying to sniff the people girl to see if she was good or bad, but before I could figure it out something else happened.

Cars came to our driveway and oh no! PEOPLE BABIES!! ALL OF THEM!! Can't those people babies EVER stay home? All three of them came in - Black Hair Girl, Black Hair Boy and Red Head Boy. Black Hair Boy can crawl now and he tries to get me! He bites me with no teeth! I don't like people babies! They were all over Mom's house. They made messes. They wrestled in the floor. And Mom just acts so silly when they are here.

All the people kids were here - Mom's and the big man's. All the people babies were here. Mom cooked a bunch of food and all the people ate too much. The people babies are not very smart about eating food. They throw it on the floor and if I am real sneaky, I can get it and be gone before anyone sees me. After they ate too much food, all the people were talking and laughing and having fun. I was trying to stay out of the people babies' way so I would not be pinched and bit by no teeth. Then, while Mom and the big man were playing with the people babies, the people kids they belonged to started sneaking away.

I couldn't believe it! They were trying to sneak off without the people babies! I followed them out to their cars! Wait! You forgot your people babies! Go back in and get them! Please, don't forget your people babies! They kept going! I was all worked up! I was hissing! I was scratching! They didn't care! They left the people babies at our house!

Mom, the big man, the people kid Julie and her man had to keep the people babies. The people kid Justin was not happy, I told you me and him are cool. He left and took his people girl with him. I wanted to go with them but Justin wouldn't let me. I think I'll just poo in his truck next time he's here.

Those people babies were everywhere. They broke stuff of Mom's and put the big man's TV toy in the big water bowl. They chased me and picked me up and pulled my tail. I was so upset and worked up. And I ate too much food. I was hot from running from people babies. I got locked in Mom's bedroom with a sleeping people baby. I had to poo. I meowed at the door and no one heard me. I get so tired of people babies messing things up for me. I just couldn't help it. I pooed in Mom's bathtub.

Mom was not happy about the poo in the bathtub. She yelled at me and put me outside. But there was no escape, the people babies are everywhere.

Mom and the big man got all fixed up Saturday. They loaded the people babies in the truck and left. I was so happy to finally be left alone. I heard Mom say later they took all the babies back to the people kids and then went to a place where a bunch of people were that knew the big man a long time ago called a class reunion. They had more good food to eat and visited with people. Mom and the big man bragged to the people about those people babies.

I just don't understand it. They poured sticky stuff on our floor, they pooed in the pants a lot, they cried, they hit each other, they lost Mom's phones, they bothered me and Mom and the big man just think they are so good. Well, they are not good! They are trouble! They should stay with their own moms. They are not cool like me, I am a cool cat.

I have not been a good cat for Mom.

She has not been happy about me. It started two nights ago. Me, Mom and the big man were in the house watching the television and folding laundry. We don't watch TV much at our house at all, mostly just the news in the mornings so we can hear those men getting all worked up about how hot it is outside. Well, we were watching the TV where a man was getting all worked up because of something called hurricanes. Mom and the big man were watching real close and paying attention, but I couldn't be still.

Something just did not feel right inside of my belly. I kept hearing loud noises outside and I had to go climb in the little wooden sticks called blinds to see outside. I saw flashes of light everywhere and I went from one window to the next trying to figure out why there were loud noises and flashes of light outside. I didn't like those things, they bothered me. I decided to go outside and I meowed at the door. Mom got up to let me out, but I changed my mind and stayed inside. Then I heard more loud noises and decided to go out again. Mom got up to let me out and well, I changed my mind again.

Mom and the big man went to bed but I couldn't sleep. It was raining outside and the wind was blowing the trees and loud noises were out there. I tried to guard the house, I kept walking around and poking my head through the little wooden sticks called blinds to see what was happening. After Mom and the big man were asleep, I decided I needed to go outside to poo and I meowed at the door. Mom woke up to let me out, but when she opened the door I ran back in the house. It was raining and blowing too hard to poo. Then I knew I had to poo bad and I didn't want to go outside and what's a cat to do and the next thing I knew I pooed in the big man's chair again.

I know Mom does not like it when I poo in the big man's chair and the big man, well, he's still the big man. I have tried to make it up to her by being really nice to her today but she does not appreciate me at all. I thought we might share together by me helping her eat her cereal. But no! She did not want to share her cereal with me. Then I thought I would just hang around her a lot but she did not like that either! She knocked me off the big water bowl two times so she could sit on it.

I've been trying to be a good cat today so she will not be mad at me any more. I don't like for Mom to be upset with because that is not cool and I am a cool cat.

I had to be a tattle tail tonight and tell on the big man. He is going to be in big trouble when he gets home.

Mom has been out of town to the place with no grass and trees with no leaves and prickly things on them called Arizona. She liked it in that place because it was warm and there were no clouds in the sky. She stayed at a nice place that brought coffee to her room in the morning.

She put on her white shoes with laces and ran away by mountains and it was very fun. At least that's what she told the big man on the phone.

The big man claims that he is very busy. He has to go to work and he goes another place where people tell him to read books and write numbers on paper called college. The big man gets very confused with the numbers on paper and when Mom is not here, he says loud words that I am not allowed to say. He hurries around to write stuff and read books and then he says he has to take a test. I think he is telling a story about that. He told Mom "I am going to college and take a test." I was watching him because I have never seen a test and I wanted to know what that was. I figured he had it hid back in his closet or something and when he got it out to take it to college, I could see it. Well. He never took anything, he just left.

Because he is so busy, or so he says, he does not do a good job feeding me or giving me cat treats. Today was one of those days where he was just running around all day, all bothered about stuff. He didn't do stuff right for me. I get annoyed at the big man for not taking good care of me like Mom tells him to.

Well, Mom surprised me by coming home tonight. I didn't know she would be back before the big man got home. So I told on him! I showed her how messy he feeds me! I am a neat cat! I don't want messy food!

He doesn't even put my food in my nice Cool Cat bowl, he just opens the cans and puts them in the floor! The big man is SO lazy and now he's in trouble. Even after I eat the food out of the can, he does not throw the can away. He leaves it in the floor. I have been so embarassed!

But I told Mom and she told me she would fuss a lot at the big man about feeding me all messy. I want to be fed clean and neat in my Cool Cat bowl because I am a cool cat.

I have been a busy cat.

I guess Mom is finally not mad at me any more. She’s been pretty nice. The big man is, well, still the big man. Mom is still going away a lot and I am still staying home. I get lonely and bored hanging around all day, keeping the big grey cat away and running from those stupid dogs that live in the yard behind us.

I got a card from my friend Ink for Halloween! I like getting stuff in the box where a truck leaves papers called the mailbox. Ink sent me a card a long time ago too when Sister got put under the big magnolia tree in the back. I still miss Sister. Ink and me are black cats and I heard from somebody that Halloween is not good for black cats, but I got a nice card for it. That means it is good for black cats because they get stuff in the box where a truck leaves papers called the mailbox.

I saw Mom reading on her computer about one of our friends that lives where very important liars live called Washington DC who found some mice in her house! She is mad! She doesn’t want mice in her house! She put out poison and the mice ate it and laughed! She needs a cat! I’m a cat!

I begged Mom to let me go to our friend’s house and kill all the mice. I know how to kill mice. OK, so I haven’t killed any here at our house – we don’t have any, I keep them away. But I kill those little baby moles in the yard and mice couldn’t be much different. I told Mom that I could ride in one of her little suitcases under the airplane seat and we could just go right away to the place where very important liars live called Washington DC. We could stay and visit at our friend’s house and I could kill all the mice. If there are too many for me to kill in a short visit, I could just stay a while longer and Mom could come back and get me. Then we could ride home together on a big airplane!

That would so much fun, don’t you think? Mom said no a bunch of times but I’m still bothering her about it. I have heard that people kids can just keeping bothering their moms about stuff until the moms say yes so I think I’m going to try that too. I hope it works because I really really want to go kill those mice. That would be so cool and I am a cool cat.